where do I draw the line

I find it hard to deal with conflict in any form.I find myself apologizing all the time because I'm trying to avoid that.I feel like I'm making myself a doormat.

But is asking for peace too much to ask for or should I just pretend like nothing happened and wait for an interrogation? Am I missing the whole point of the whole apology concept or am I just too soft? where do I draw the line?

It's supposed to make things better so that you and I can smile at each other again, not make the situation worse. who is fighting here and what for?

We all make mistakes and some make more mistakes than others, that's the way it is.We are supposed to learn from these mistakes so that we can act or react in a better way in future but we may take a little longer to learn from some mistakes.

When I say,"I'm sorry", it means that I'm acknowledging my mistake and I apologize for any harm that I may have caused to you, I'm trying to keep the peace between us.That is how I show my respect to you.By respecting how you feel, I show my respect you.

Sometimes I may shoulder your mistake and apologize if you find it hard to do so,that way if I cannot have peace with you, then I can at least try to bring some peace to myself.

Is asking for peace to much to ask for? where do I draw the line?

The battle

He goes to work everyday,just to cover his living expenses and bring something home.....
But he hates it, he hates it so much that it's tearing him apart,giving him an indistinguishable heartburn.

He is strong when he is with me,and the flames in his heart subside. For that moment he is calm and at peace. He is in harmony with the universe, as happy as a person would never imagine to be.

I constantly pray that my love gives him enough strength to overcome this war inside him because I have to go and leave him to stand on his own.That's one of the hardest things that I do not like doing.

He is fighting because he is not where he wants to be because he is destined for greater things. He is working on it but the faith and strength that he has to survive fluctuates and it is interrogated by fear.

All I can do is pray when I'm away from him but I want to do more.
All I can say is that," I LOVE YOU BABY", and hope that he feels it and his heart 'butterflies' again because I mountain like that you see...?

But my heart gets sore when he is feeling down like this and I just wanna hold him and tell him that everything is going to be OK because I am his soldier.

My heart aches but I draw strength from his love and I pray to keep the faith because I believe in him.

So much love, so much passion, the vision is there......my baby is going to be fine because I am his Queen and he is my King , our kingdom is ruled by love and that is everything we need.

I'm here for my Musa when he needs me,he knows that. The battle will end and he will come out victorious because he has all the armour and he is stronger that ever.

My inspiration

Today I woke up around 8:15am and I had a mild headache,so I stayed in bed for a while and got up after a few minutes.I felt dizzy,then I felt sad....Musawenkosi,came into my mind and I smiled but my heart felt a bit sore because I couldn't look into his eyes and tell him that I love him him,then I thought,"Baby wouldn't like to see me in this state"I smiled and focused on the wonderful feeling that came with the thought of having him near me and that I'm even fortunate enough to get to say that I'm in love.

Things are not so bad after all because I'm still smililng.Yeah...life gave me a couple of slaps,but who hasn't gotten any of those from it?The only difference is how one chooses to react.I'm not gonna stand there and feel sorry for myself forever,of course it hurts and yes,I did cry...so what?but that's not what I want to spend the rest of my time doing and I'm surely not gonna waste all my energy feeling sorry.

He came back into my mind again and I heard him say that he loves me,now,that is something worth living for.Im not gonna lie to you and and tell you that the past doesn't matter anymore because it does.But that's not where I am today,I'm living in the Present and living for the future what good will it do for me if I just sit there and feel sorry for something that happened in the past?The important thing is to remember the past so you can see where you are going and understand how you got to the present.I'm living now and living for the future,"begin with the end in mind",Yes,that's what I remember hearing him say.

The law of attraction is always at work,shape your thoughts and build yourself to become what you want to become,have what you want to have and most importantly.....live the life that you want to live.Its simple really, you just need to know how it works..use your emotions.The best emotion to choose is the one that can help you overcome your weaknesses by turning them into your strengths,be it love,gratitude or happiness,all the better if you can use all of them.For me,it's love because it makes me happy and then it is accompanied by gratitude.

Positive thinking = Positive Attitude and attitude determines your altitude,and that is my formula ;-)

I walk fast

I am always walking fast even when I'm in no rush because I'm trying to escape
I don't want the past to catch up with me, so I avoid it by thinking about my future
My music is my other escape route,if i can't hear it I sing.
I like having my own space, have time to myself in isolation from other things.
I meditate....I know the secret, and it works every time but sometimes it is just a quick fix.
Now, we all know that such things don't last for long...but you know what???? I believe in the secret.

Faith=belief and I won't go wrong with that.

Now I need to stop and ask myself if this is really working for me.....
I need to slow down...and you know what?
I have just realised that nobody is after me...
I must relax.